Water coolers and wieners

Today I finally buckled under and ordered water delivery to the house. Honestly, I realized that Lacy and I have not been drinking enough water and we needed to stop drinking juice and lemonade. Our new cooler arrived this morning. While I was excited to finally have cold, yummy water in the house again, I didn't realize what a thrill it would be for Lacy.

As I set the cooler up and plugged it in Lacy said, "I dreamed about this all night and here it is!" and then proceeded to consume 15 glasses of water. As of 10pm tonight there is nearly 1/3 of the water jug gone! Yes she has been peeing quite a bit today.

In other news, we still have our Bullmastiff and he is growing larger by the day. Being a male puppy, he has certain male parts that have become evident to Lacy. One such item is his wiener. (Yup, that's what we call it 'round here.)

This evening we went to the hardware store to pick up a new trash can. Lacy... being, well, Lacy... decided it was her new puppy and spent a good half hour talking to it and teaching it tricks.

As Randy and I sat together absorbed in our own thoughts, Lacy put her arm around the trash can and said to us, "is it just me or is his wiener hanging out?"

Randy and I just about died, but refused to respond... basically we couldn't do anything or else we'd bust out laughing. After about 5 seconds of silence she followed up with, "...seriously guys, I think his wiener is TOTALLY hanging out."

Classic Lacy.

Shoe Pads

A few months ago Lacy stumbled upon a package of maxi pads in a bathroom counter. She asked us what they were and Randy decided to fill her in:

"They are shoe pads" he told her. And she was content with that.

Today Lacy found another box of shoe pads and happily installed a set into her shoes and wore them out. As we were walking, she casually mentioned to me that, "these shoe pads are GREAT, mom. I really feel pumped up!"

Shoe pads? For a split second I couldn't recall what on earth she was talking about.

Until I looked down.

Maxi pads were sticking out the front and back of her shoes.

Ahhh... shoe pads.

Of course!

Lacy Does Her Best Billy Joel.

I was trying to sneak a video of Lacy on her piano, but she caught me... evidently I am not ready to go rogue with my video skills.

If she's not getting all Liza Minnelli on us with her impromptu singing (usually around 6am) we will find her doing her best Billy Joel impression...

For the record, we can't understand what she is singing about either!

Top 10 Weird Medical Anomalies

No big surprise, Lacy's medical issue is number six on this list. They totally got the treatment and problems wrong, but whatever.

Not sure what I think about this. Did my kid's issue really need to be lumped in with hermaphrodites and human werewolf syndrome?

Stupid list.

Keepin' It Together...

Randy hates crowds. Despises them to his very core. He also hates stupid people. Traditionally, (at least in our town) where you find large crowds, you find large amounts of stupid people.

One of the best places to find such large crowds is Costco (again, at least in our town)! Stupid people are given very large carts and forced down tiny isles. Good times for everyone.

Just for kicks I sent Randy on a Costco trip to pick up a few thing. The icing on top? I made him take Lacy.

According to my husband, it wasn't "as bad as expected" but Lacy obviously picked up on the tension. As they squeezed past the family gingerly walking four-wide down the isle, she grabbed the front of Randy's shirt, put her hands on his face and said to him, "Keep it together, dad. Keep it together, man!"

Never a dull moment with that kid!

Pretty Pricy Place

Yesterday Randy and I decided to pack Lacy's room up while she was in the bath. (Less drama that way!) By the time she was done with her bath, we had most of her toys safely packed away or tossed in the trash.

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As per our standard procedure, Lacy finished her bath and came straight into her room so one of us could do her hair and change her trache before she got herself dressed.

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As I was finishing up her hair, I noticed she was looking at her dollhouse, now completely empty because we'd packed it all away. I asked her, "What the heck happened to your dollhouse, Lace? It looks like they just packed all of their stuff up and left!"

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Without missing a beat Lacy said, "Oh, yeah, they couldn't afford the place!"

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Randy and I fell over laughing! Pretty good comedic timing for a four-year-old!