It is done.

Lacy only has one mommy now! Rosa Linda has been terminated as her mother and Lacy is up for adoption!

The What-Ifs

The what-ifs are killing me today. I have been waiting for a phone call from Lacy's social worker all morning. He is supposed to tell us what the judge decided in terms of her birth mom. Does she get more time to establish a relationship with Lacy? Are we going to lose her? What if we do? What if this is all the time we get?

What if...

What if...

What if...

Developmental Progress Report

I received Lacy's progress report from her preschool the other day. I did not pick this preschool for her, in fact she has been attending this particular school since she was living at the facility. We chose to leave Lacy at this place for the first six months of her coming home so that she would have consistency. Recently I have noticed that she has yet to actually learn anything... my assumption was confirmed when I finally sat down and read her progress report:

Cognitive: Laci cognitive skills are right on track. She has no problem solving anything.

First off, her name is LACY... and she has no problem solving anything? I'm sorry, is this the same kid that falls on the floor in tears because she can't get her own pants off? PS I am typing this exactly as it is written. Enjoy the grammar!

Language: Laci language skills are right on target, she communicate very well with others.

She communicate well?

Gross Motor: Laci gross motor skills are right on track, she is very flexible.

I'm not even going to comment on that.

Fine Motor: Laci fine motor skills are right on track, she enjoys putting the puzzles together.

I enjoy doing ballet in my kitchen, however, that does not mean my skills are "right on track".

Social: Laci loves interacting with everyone she is very friendly and generous.

Self Help: We are working on Laci potty training. Laci tends daily to wash her face and hands after meals and after potty.

Special Notes: It's a delight to enjoy Laci presents daily, she is smart funny and a team player. Everyone enjoys Laci friendship because she welcome's you saying "Hi bestfriend".

Here's my deal with this. I totally get that to many of these instructors, the language barrier is a very real thing. That alone is not an issue. In fact I am exceedingly grateful that they are so willing to work with Lacy. In fact many of them have been teaching her Spanish! However, the person whose name is on the letterhead is supposedly an educated individual! Hello? Isn't it her job to review this? Seriously, this type of thing speaks directly to her credibility. Or lack thereof.

Too Funny...

Apparently Tank found his long lost brother, Eeyore!

In other amusing news: In southern Wisconsin, Pat Dykstra decided to drive home after a night at the bar, but somewhere along the way she feels she may be too drunk to drive and calls 911.

Caller: I just want to know if somebody can follow me home because somebody seems to think I can't drive home straight.

911: OK, why is that?

Caller: He seems to think I am too intoxicated to drive.

911: OK, and so you called 9-1-1 or he called 9-1-1?

Caller: Well, he wanted me to call 9-1-1 'cause he thinks I'm too drunk to drive.

On the plus side, she was even safety minded when she called 911:

Caller: I don't like being on the phone while I'm driving.

911: OK. Well I can certainly let you go Pat. I don't want to cause an accident.

Caller: I would appreciate that 'cause I don't like driving on the phone.

Pat's drunk boyfriend was sitting in the passenger seat besides her. She told 911 she was driving, because he was too drunk. She then told them what kind of car she had and gave them her home address. When she got home, police arrived and gave her a Breathalyzer. She blew a .14 and was given a drunk driving ticket. Pat doesn't think it's fair, because she was already home when police arrived.

"I was home already in my pajamas going to bed," said Dykstra.

Sheriff Todd Nehl's says pat did the right thing. "I think a judge will look at her and say you know what, you stepped up to the plate. You did the right thing. I think it's commendable," he said.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha....biiiig breath... aaaannnnddd.... ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Yeah, I am sure that's exactly what the judge will do. Commendable is exactly the word I was thinking...

What a difference...

So I was looking over the MILLION pictures we have of Lacy. I am blown away to see how much she has changed. This is a copy of the picture they had of her in her medical file at the facility!

I took this picture back in April of 07 on one of our very first trips to play with her! She was two and a half.

Here is Lacy on her first visit to our home before she finally came home for good! (I bought her that t-shirt!)

This is Lacy about six weeks after coming home with us (it was her 3rd birthday).

Here we are nine months after our first meeting!

What I Do...

Often I am asked what it is that I do for a living. Most people have never heard of a Respiratory Therapist or even used one... and by the time you need an RT you don't really have time to pay attention to that kind of stuff. By the time we get called onto the scene things tend to be looking pretty bad. I found some pictures online (from a hospital on the east coast) of exactly what I deal with at work. Just in case you ever wondered.

This baby is actually pretty big... many of ours are about half this size. She is on a ventilator in this picture, which is what I deal with. This little one recently lost her fight and passed away. My thoughts and prayers are with her family.

In fact, here is one that is closer to the size I am used to. It is our job to get that tube in their throat. Last week I had to intubate a baby and it was the first time I wasn't standing there going, "oh crap! oh crap!" Most people don't realize that what we do in the first few moments of life makes such a huge difference. If we don't catch something right away, the child could have major issues for life... or possibly not even live. I deal with these machines. I can't think of any easy way to explain how and what is happening, we'll just stick with, "good air in, bad air out".
again, here is another (more close up picture) of what we do. The machine in the back is an oscillator. It's a ventilator... of sorts.
Here is a picture of a transport isolette. We use one just like this to go pick up "bad babies". If a baby is born at another hospital that doesn't have an NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit), we have to go get them using one of these things.
Like the little girl in these pictures, death is part of the job. It sucks. But I have to say that we (and obviously the parents) are lucky to have met these kiddos if only for a little while. It is very easy to get attached to them and hard to see them pass.

Just a side note, one of the few shows I watch (and love) is John and Kate plus 8 on TLC. Partly because they remind me of Randy and I. (She bosses him around and he takes it. But in the end they are totally in love!) I also love it because it presents hope to all of the families that have micro-preemies and how happy and healthy they can grow up to be!

As you can see, ventilators are "what I do" so hopefully you can understand why Lacy's trach and vent is not a big deal to us. It fits our life and we are happy. I know that many people are shocked to think that we brought such a huge deal into our lives, and I know that her "look" is a little intimidating to many. Five years ago I would have felt the same way. Becoming an RT has changed my life in so many ways. I know Randy feels the same way as well (he is an RT too).

Music Machine

Every once in a while I run into another kid who grew up in the church during the late 70's and early 80's to discover I'm not the only one who knows the words to Music Machine and Bullfrogs and Butterflies. My sister sent one of these old childhood albums to our house and I couldn't wait for Lacy to experience all of those spiffy tunes!

My only regret is that it doesn't come in a record album like I remember... I loved sitting and looking at that cover for hours! All Lacy has is a tiny little CD cover with very little artwork. Bummer! She went to bed with the CD playing and she loves it... whirr whirr chicka chicka bump bump... ( At least Becky will get that!)

All I could find was this small clip... and then I was just jonesin for some Matisyahu's A King Without a Crown... one of those CD's I will keep forever.

'Tis the Season...

... to be SICK!!!

I can not explain the misery I feel right now. Seriously, I have not been this sick in years. Last night I finally made the decision to head into the hospital and get seen. I was pretty sure they were going to admit me! Fortunately they didn't... the doctor just sent me home with no less than FIVE prescriptions! Yowzer! I need to take the 'scripts to the pharmacy, but I am not a big pill popper and it bothers me that he gave me TWO antibiotics for a VIRAL issue! I know they are prophylactic, but it still bothers me!

Keep Lacy in your prayers that she doesn't get what I have, because of her trach and respiratory issues, this could put her in the Children's Hospital very quickly... also the court date for birth mom is on the 30th. This is the re-scheduled date from the 15th of this month. Mom has yet to show up to any of her court dates but they just continue to re-schedule them for her! Argh! We are ready for this to be over so we can get on with our lives! So keep Lacy in your prayers! Thanks!

Jo

From Rags to Riches...

This is the hotel I booked for $50 a night. At least, this is the picture provided to me online...

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This is the hotel we checked into. Notice the giant stain on the wall and the "floating headboard"

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Here is the thermostat.
The doorway
The screen was bent and the window had NO LOCK!
Lacy just wanted to watch a video while Randy and I tried to figure out if it would be better to sleep in the car! In the end we decided to stay only one night and then find a better place the next day!

Lacy didn't care the the hotel was scummy... she just wanted to have a blast at Disneyland!

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.Mickey ears on...
Let's go!!!!!!

First stop, the tea pots, of course!

She couldn't go fast enough!

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After a few rides at Disneyland, Lacy finally crashed out for her afternoon nap. Randy and I discussed the possibility of finding a new hotel room at the Disneyland resort. I figured that we might be able to get a deal on a room because we were officially in the slow season... so we walked over to the Grand California Hotel and got in line. As we waited our turn at the reservation counter, I struck up a conversation with one of the cast members nearby. I noticed that she was looking at my kid on a vent, so I just started telling her the whole story of Lacy. Apparently she was pretty impressed because next thing we knew we were the Magical Moments Guest of the Day, and we were being taken up to the Disney Suite at this hotel for the night! How lucky were we??? They made a big production of everything in the lobby, announcement and all. I was blown away. It was a very magical moment for our whole family.Here is the view of our hotel... A daytime view from the balcony! You can see Disneyland from here!Our living room.




patio

bedroom

We ordered room service...

....and dined on the patio!

.After our meal we went back out for a few more rides...

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Randy is living out a life-long dream here... well, except he didn't have an actual airplane!
Getting ready for our last ride of the night!
"You guys are going to get pneumonia" Larci said

"No way" I responded

As it turns out, I got sick.

Lacy waited with Larci while mom and dad went on Pneumonia Rapids

This is the night view from our balcony!

When we got back from the rides, we found our beds turned down and ready for us to get some sleep! Very cool!
Playing snuggle bears with aunt Larci!

Getting her nails painted the next morning...

And a new hair do...

Just got her hair and nails "did", she is ready to meet some Disney Characters... In fact, I have discovered that the cuter your kid is, the more attention they get from the Disney characters. Whenever we put Lacy in a princess dress, she tends to score more photo opportunities than when she is in regular street clothes. It is possible that she gets a few extra points for the trach, and I am sure a few more for the glasses (they are so freaking cute!), but regardless... if you want to score some awesome pictures for your kiddos, invest in a princess dress. Unless of course you have a little boy.. but then again, I have a feeling that more than one of those male cast members owns a princess dress of their own!

Buzz rules!

Show me some muscles!

They stopped what they were doing to come see Lacy! How cool!





What a princess!

Almost got to meet Mrs Incredible!


The photographer who really hooked us up! He took Lacy around and introduced her to most of the characters. (While other, less attractive kids, went ignored)

A personal greet with Mickey himself!

Randy and Larci wanted to get a picture with the wicked witch. I had noting to do with this one, Lisa!

Our final ride of the night was the Matterhorn! Lacy's first time on this ride was earlier in the day. Half way through the ride she said, "I'm done, mom! I want to get off". The ride was pretty bumpy and wild, I felt badly that she had to stay on till the ride was over. I was worried that she'd freak when we went past the mosters, but as to be expected, she loved that part. By the time we pulled up to the end of the ride Lacy wanted to, "...GO AGAIN and see the monsters!"